Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
