Its about making memories worth repressing
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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