covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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