Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
