i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
