The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize