Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He? As in you personified your dick?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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