Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
