he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
