my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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