But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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