I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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