I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
