Sponge bath it is.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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