You surviving the open bar?
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i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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