I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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