Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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