i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
