I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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