Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Girls should come with a carfax report
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize