We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
