I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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