So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
