There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
