I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
