Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
