Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
