Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
