This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
