WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
