Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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