I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
True but thats because hes a fetus.
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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