i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
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