Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
