So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Hello my rib-scented angel!
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
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