I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
