when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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