ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
