after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
