i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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