They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
