So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
