He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
