Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
