happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize