your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize