He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize