He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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