We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
