I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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