It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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