4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize