??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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